Welcome to Olivia's Daughter....a blog that I created in March 2010 to document my blessed journey of healing. Since I began this blog, my mother has gone home to be with the Lord along with my son, Chris Reshaud Jordan, who was murdered in October 2009. After these two devastating events, I felt forsaken by God. I cried out to the Lord seeking my purpose in life. Throughout this experience, I had to make the choice to surrender to a life of worthlessness or to live my life to the fullest, a life filled with abundance and love.


God has strengthened me. I am seeking Him daily and and working to live in His will which is leading me to my purpose and passion. I think of Chris and Olivia constantly, but I have turned this over to God. I want God to use me as his vessel giving Him the glory.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Alright it is Day 1 again ! – Relying on God

Alright it is Day 1 again ! – Relying on God

I have another day to bless someone else. I am praying that today will be the day I will be able to reach out and bless others. Lord give me peace throughout the day and allow your glory to shine through me.

My day started off well, I gave God the glory early before I got up. I am so grateful to the God I serve for delivering me.

Today will be my official first day of abstintence. The other days were not official because I had not touched based with my sponsor for FA. This morning at 6:45 started my day. I am excited. I had to give the sponsor my current weight and my meals for
Day 1. We had a nice discussion about food and our strengths and weaknesses.

Good news is that I have maintained my weight since the first week of August which was my official last weigh in at TI. I am so pleased with this, during this time span I have not been as focused but continued to eat in moderation and exercise, but my diet had not been as strict. Tomorrow I will weigh in at True Image (TI) and I will be on track. There has been two months of no loss, but it has been a successful time, I have eaten out at restarants (a lot), participated in a wedding (with lots of food) and attended my dear aunt’s repass (soul food). What I noticed was that I was not as strict, but I continued to eat salads not a lot of sugar or bread, only 2 regular pops at the repass. I worked out 2 to 3 times per week and did not walk. This shows me that when I get to my maintainance phase I will be able to maintain my weight over the long term with exercise and moderation.

In order to give me added support, I gained the support of FA which gives me group meetings, portion control, no sugar no flour, and sponsorship. I also joined two life groups at church Women of Moderation and Celebrate Recovery, so that I can further explore my healing. I want to thank God for placing these supports within my reach.

I am noticing I am feeling good about me and this is definitely bringing me closer to Christ. I am praying over each meal for real and thanking God, it is such a sacrifice for me. I love food and food has surrounded everything good and bad experience in my life. Food has comforted me, now without the food I rely on GOD.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Day 3 - God was in the Mix

Day 3 – God was in the Mix

Today has been a blessing to me and for this I am grateful ! Lord you surround me with friends that are so encouraging. Please allow me to be the same type of friend to others.

Last evening, prayer service was awesome. I was able to cry out to God in corporate prayer. Thank you Lord. My Life Group – Celebrate Recovery was super awesome. I am loving the word of God and the women of God in the group. I missed two weeks during the wedding and my aunt’s funeral. Thank you Lord for getting me right back on track.

Yesterday was special to me I was able to enjoy my 3 meals and honor God and glorify Him for providing for me. I mentioned in yesterday’s blog that I had no lunch and he provided me with a salad from a coworker/good friend. Awesome, it was a basic salad which worked for my plan. During Life Group there were snacks but God gave me the strength to pass. When I got home I enjoyed my meal oh much better, I prayed over it and enjoyed each and every bite of it. It is nice to know I can keep my eyes on my own plate and eat the meals I have planned out for myself. I was offered a cookie on my way out of church, there have been times when I would have picked up 2, I passed them up not because of the calorie intake, but because I have made a decision to not eat sugar or flour, and I am working to keep my promise. There was Victory in that moment of denying the cookie. I have denied myself of foods before, because I have lost 54 lbs since March 1st, but there was something different about this time. The difference was God was in the mix.

I truly love my NCBF family, really, really, really, really Godly people. Our leadership is so great, God pours into them and it spreads like wild fire. I receive the Love of NCBF and offer love to others.

I may have to start my 90 on Monday. If so I am cool with it. Very cool with it. So if you see me back to Day 1 it is ok. I have not been able to touch base with my sponsor so I these days may not count, but they count as far as putting me back on track and focusing and causing me to lean on the Lord !

Thanking God for my accountability partners, awesome women of God. I talked with one yesterday after work and we are moving in the right direction.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Day 2

88 more - Day 2

One Day at a Time – One second at a time

I am entering into Day 2 and I am so grateful to God for his promise to never leave or forsake me. Lord you are so worthy of the praise and the honor. I come to you with a heart of thanksgiving and praise.

Day 2 – I am excited and anxious to move forward. God’s will has been done and I have been given a sponsor of accountability, actually yesterday I was given to accountability partners. Praise God ! So actually I have three including True Image. I am so grateful, God has provided me with good Godly team of cheerleaders that that surround me. I plan to cheer them on too. As I am writing this True Image texted me to hold me accountable. Thank you Lord.

I started this morning in a positive manner. God is in control of everything. Last night’s Life Group was awesome, several of us did our Focus Board including myself. It was a good experience to share, it helps everybody.

I look forward to touching base with my sponsor today. I learned Monday that sponsor help in a special way. They will step in and not allow me to sell myself short. If I think I have reached a goal they may set a new one for me. I have a Godly person as my sponsor for this I am grateful. We can actually pray together.

I have prayer meeting tonight and my recovery/grief Life Group. Praise God for the word of God.

Praise Report : Lord is a provider for me. Today during my lunch I was not able to pick up my salad due to time restraints. I had a apple on my desk, I texted a coworker and she had a spinach and romaine salad with chicken breast. Boy was it delicious, I prayed over it and it was satisfying to me and met my hunger needs. Thank you Lord for Day 2.


191.2

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

89 1/2 more days


















































Today is Day 1 of Abstinstent from my Food Addiction
I have made it through breakfast and lunch. Snack time is fastly approaching and I have reached out for help by way of prayer from some friends and I am praying for strength and will power. Prospective sponser will let me know tonight if she can sponsor me. I am praying that this is God’s will in my life, I would like to know my sponsor. I have read the 12 steps and the 12 Traditions. I am beginning to work this plan into my life. I am working to figure out how I will get my meetings in at least 2 per week. My dilemna is exercise and weigh ins – this plan works against exercise and regular weigh ins. I must weigh in the a.m. so I know where I began. Weigh ins for this program is once a month verses TI weekly approach.

I am thanking God for this program and it feels promising. I must be able to deal with my feelings in order to keep the food out of my mouth. I am in need of motivation, my mind is so ready to turn back, I feel as thought I need food in my life to survive. Eating 3 meals and no snacks per day will leave me weak, hungry and probably moody. I will move on in excitement and expecting a miracle. 90 days of abstinstent is around the corner, I only have 89 ½ days left. LOL Praise God ! I will give God the glory daily and expect good things for my life and those around me. I will share the news of FA with others in hope of them fighting their food addiction. I am excited about knowing that when I complete 90 days I will have lost some significant weight and will have gained a much closer relationship to God whom I am trusting in all this and keeping Him first in my life.




Check out Oren and Nicole, wonderful couple. Also pictures of Jayden's first hair cut for the wedding, he was the ring bearer, see him in his lil tux.


Hey that's me up there, 3 dress sizes dpwm/ Getting into this dress was my motivation and I lost 54 lbs. Now that the wedding is over, I have new motivation, surrending and getting closer relationship with God. WOW - New goal after 90 days of abstinstence is Size 10. I had said size 12, after last night's meeting I don't want to SHORT CUT MYSELF. Love it !

Thursday, September 1, 2011

OFF TRACK


Lord give me focus ! Please Lord !

For the past 2 to 3 weeks I have been off track with my weight loss program. Not to say I have been overeating, but my motivating is leaving me. I find myself treading to workout and I do not push myself to walk daily. I am beginning to eat emotionally, I need to regain my focus.

Lord I am reaching out knowing that you can help me, help myself. I have lots on my mind, everyday stresses and loads more, but I know you are able to give me the peace that surpassing all understanding.

Thank You Lord !