The Lord blessed me with good family and friends. My family keeps me going. I am thanking God for placing me in this family. My grandson, is a genuine gift from God. Yesterday when he saw me , he ran with open arms, wanting to be picked up. When I picked him up, he kissed me as best as he could on my cheek. It was the first kiss he gave to me without me asking for it. It was so special and appropriate for mother’s day.
I kept myself busy with family during the day. In the evening I allowed myself to cry, to get it out. I miss Olivia and Chris so much ! They tugged at my heart off and on all day. When I look in the mirror I see Olivia, I look just like her. Fortunate for me J She prided herself on being a good looking Black woman. Back in her day dark skinned wasn’t cute, but she had great self esteem. Praise God. I see myself in her eyes, her smile and her caring. Yesterday, family had to talk about her sense of humor, if they hadn’t they would not have been giving her memory the justice it deserved. We all missed her, and could on key say this is what Olivia would have said. And we would laugh out loud. I see Chris is Jayden daily. He has the same build Chris had as a toddler, the same lil curly hair and friendly smile. Jayden’s personality is his own, he is such a crowd pleaser.
I am overwhelmed in some areas of my life, but I am handling it as best as I can. God is helping me daily to work through issues.
OK Eating ! I had peach cobbler, birthday cake, fried corn, yams, fried chicken, mashed potatoes and Pop. I did not eat the ribs J I had this menu Saturday and then went back to my aunt’s house and had it on Sunday ! AWESOME ! Believe it or not, I am not feeling guilty, that food was good to the bone. I did not waste a single calorie ! I have refocused and back on track this morning. I talked to my exercise buddy this morning and she ate this weekend too. We support one another unconditionally J So I am off to another wonderfully blessed week.
Monica, me and Tree played with makeup and Jewelry. I have done a couple of things to my bedroom as far as using appropriate space, and I love it. Tony is completing a project in my bedroom today, hanging a few things and then I will post some photos. Again, I thank you Lord for my gifting. I am now a sort of fashion consultant, I have an assignment of helping a young female put together her look for prom, accessories, makeup, etc.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
House in Order !!!
Organization
Lord I thank you for giving me the desire to get my HOUSE IN ORDER. I absolutely love a comfortable home, to me this means, order and cleanliness. My mom taught me how to clean and decorate a house at a VERY early age. I remember her getting me up on Saturday mornings to clean, I HATED it then, but I appreciate it now. Up until I was able 12 years old my mother was a housekeeper/maid, and she was allowed to take me to work with her. She did not complain about being a housekeeper. She loved working with her hands. She worked for Ms. Kelly, a very kind lady who had an amazing home in Shaker Heights, I will remember her house forever, and it was decorated so nicely, her kitchen was magnificent. Back then her rooms had amazing colors. In her home I saw décor taken to another level, my mother’s home was beautiful, but this house had wired in speaker in every room, bricked kitchen floor. It took me out of what was ordinary to extraordinary. I watched my mother clean it and I would often assist her and I enjoyed cleaning this woman’s house, because after it was clean it looked like a photo in a magazine. I was impressed by her home and how my mother’s skills made her house rock. Now mind you when my mother came home she kept her home the same way, so there it is.
I am getting my house in order. Things have really gotten out of hand. I love being organized and knowing where things are. Since my meltdown on Sunday, I have begun to do a good Spring cleaning. I have begun in my bedroom, where I spend most of my time. I brought a few reasonably organizers to help me make sense of my cosmetics, makeup and jewelry. My bedroom is small, it does not even have a closet, which is OK. I have a large closet in the hallway. My bedroom is too small to have a dresser. Because I do not have a dresser I did not have space to put my girly things. I brought a long glass table this summer from a yard sale and I have decided to use it as my vanity/makeup table. I got some really good ideas from You Tube. Yesterday, I went to Michael’s and got some organizers, and organizers were 40% off, which meant I got a really really nice organizer which is my focal piece for 20.99, it had been 29.99. I was thrilled. I also got some sand and vase filler to make a couple of brush holders. I decorated some of the containers with black and white nice ribbons. I even separated in a container, my MAC shadows from my NYX shadows. Most of the items are labeled this way I know where to return them and will be able to reach for them again. I made a special jumbo eye pencil holder which I am especially proud of. It was not my idea but I built on the concept.
Today I will pick up lighting. I think I will be getting a GE Bright Light. Then I may invest in a makeup mirror which is 29.99, I can use a $5.00 off coupon at Ulta in Mentor. I will go back next weekend as I have to use my coupon within 2 weeks. Then I can do my make up transformations sitting in my bedroom. YES YES YES I have been carrying cosmetics and makeup into the bathroom with me every time I get dressed which was time consuming and a real mess to clean up. This is a real blessing, I love pulling a look together be it, home decorating, make up, fashion or event décor. I love how God works in me and I know this is the gifting he has blessed me with. I pick up things in the store and sometimes I don’t even know what I will do with it, but I feel it is needed and it works out. My vanity/makeup table is cute.
I will upload a photo of my vanity/makeup table when it is complete. I make upload a video to walk through my special project J I think I am turning into a You Tube junkie. J
I will continue to clean, dust and mop. Real Spring cleaning has got to go down at the pad. Sticky fingers and crumbs are all over the place (Jayden J ). He does assist in cleaning up his large blocks J
The basement is a real trip. All of the things from my mother’s estate that I didn’t use upstairs, are in the BASEMENT !! OHHHHHH HELP !!! The basement is a genuine mess. My mother prided herself on keeping the basement spotless, she would kill me, if she saw it. I plan to go down there and get things arranged for a couple of yard sales. Yes, Yard Sale season is approaching. I am thrilled, my girl Par and Tree and me will be hitting the road. Par got a GPS for Christmas so we will be out and about. Oh, back to my sale. It will be nice to get things organized in the basement and ready for sale. During the winter I invested in a couple of 6 foot tables, I will be able to use them to set up items for sale.
Lifestyle Healthy Eating : I am eating well, need to get back on my water drinking of 8 glasses per day L Zumba schedule has changed, it is now Tuesday and Thursday at True Image, so my future blogs with be Twosome Tuesday (2 workouts in one day). So tonight is Twosome Tuesday. I have not done my morning weigh in since Friday. I will weigh in this week.
See ya ! May God Bless !
Lord I thank you for giving me the desire to get my HOUSE IN ORDER. I absolutely love a comfortable home, to me this means, order and cleanliness. My mom taught me how to clean and decorate a house at a VERY early age. I remember her getting me up on Saturday mornings to clean, I HATED it then, but I appreciate it now. Up until I was able 12 years old my mother was a housekeeper/maid, and she was allowed to take me to work with her. She did not complain about being a housekeeper. She loved working with her hands. She worked for Ms. Kelly, a very kind lady who had an amazing home in Shaker Heights, I will remember her house forever, and it was decorated so nicely, her kitchen was magnificent. Back then her rooms had amazing colors. In her home I saw décor taken to another level, my mother’s home was beautiful, but this house had wired in speaker in every room, bricked kitchen floor. It took me out of what was ordinary to extraordinary. I watched my mother clean it and I would often assist her and I enjoyed cleaning this woman’s house, because after it was clean it looked like a photo in a magazine. I was impressed by her home and how my mother’s skills made her house rock. Now mind you when my mother came home she kept her home the same way, so there it is.
I am getting my house in order. Things have really gotten out of hand. I love being organized and knowing where things are. Since my meltdown on Sunday, I have begun to do a good Spring cleaning. I have begun in my bedroom, where I spend most of my time. I brought a few reasonably organizers to help me make sense of my cosmetics, makeup and jewelry. My bedroom is small, it does not even have a closet, which is OK. I have a large closet in the hallway. My bedroom is too small to have a dresser. Because I do not have a dresser I did not have space to put my girly things. I brought a long glass table this summer from a yard sale and I have decided to use it as my vanity/makeup table. I got some really good ideas from You Tube. Yesterday, I went to Michael’s and got some organizers, and organizers were 40% off, which meant I got a really really nice organizer which is my focal piece for 20.99, it had been 29.99. I was thrilled. I also got some sand and vase filler to make a couple of brush holders. I decorated some of the containers with black and white nice ribbons. I even separated in a container, my MAC shadows from my NYX shadows. Most of the items are labeled this way I know where to return them and will be able to reach for them again. I made a special jumbo eye pencil holder which I am especially proud of. It was not my idea but I built on the concept.
Today I will pick up lighting. I think I will be getting a GE Bright Light. Then I may invest in a makeup mirror which is 29.99, I can use a $5.00 off coupon at Ulta in Mentor. I will go back next weekend as I have to use my coupon within 2 weeks. Then I can do my make up transformations sitting in my bedroom. YES YES YES I have been carrying cosmetics and makeup into the bathroom with me every time I get dressed which was time consuming and a real mess to clean up. This is a real blessing, I love pulling a look together be it, home decorating, make up, fashion or event décor. I love how God works in me and I know this is the gifting he has blessed me with. I pick up things in the store and sometimes I don’t even know what I will do with it, but I feel it is needed and it works out. My vanity/makeup table is cute.
I will upload a photo of my vanity/makeup table when it is complete. I make upload a video to walk through my special project J I think I am turning into a You Tube junkie. J
I will continue to clean, dust and mop. Real Spring cleaning has got to go down at the pad. Sticky fingers and crumbs are all over the place (Jayden J ). He does assist in cleaning up his large blocks J
The basement is a real trip. All of the things from my mother’s estate that I didn’t use upstairs, are in the BASEMENT !! OHHHHHH HELP !!! The basement is a genuine mess. My mother prided herself on keeping the basement spotless, she would kill me, if she saw it. I plan to go down there and get things arranged for a couple of yard sales. Yes, Yard Sale season is approaching. I am thrilled, my girl Par and Tree and me will be hitting the road. Par got a GPS for Christmas so we will be out and about. Oh, back to my sale. It will be nice to get things organized in the basement and ready for sale. During the winter I invested in a couple of 6 foot tables, I will be able to use them to set up items for sale.
Lifestyle Healthy Eating : I am eating well, need to get back on my water drinking of 8 glasses per day L Zumba schedule has changed, it is now Tuesday and Thursday at True Image, so my future blogs with be Twosome Tuesday (2 workouts in one day). So tonight is Twosome Tuesday. I have not done my morning weigh in since Friday. I will weigh in this week.
See ya ! May God Bless !
Monday, May 2, 2011
Monday Again !
It’s Monday !
Yes, It’s Monday and I’m not complaining. I thank the Lord everyday for my job. With the changes government are making our agency is funded by public monies. I feel confident that we will survive, our agency has been aggressive in the last 5 years of turning our mom and pop agency into a corporation. Word on the street has it that if funds are cut drastically they have targeted 18 positions that would be cut first. One of our programs will be cut in June, contract will not be renewed. I pray that God will open other doors for these employees. Life has taught me that we have to be prepared to accept God’s will in our lives. We have to listen to God and see how He would have us proceed. I feel blessed that I have been at this agency for 17 years.
Yesterday I lost my temper, I was so angry. My kitchen and entire house was a mess. Lots of grown people in the house, but I feel I am the only one keeping the house in order. I do not like to lose my temper, it is so ugly. I do not like laziness and I am beginning to feel like the house keeper. This is not a good feeling. I like cooperation, join in, roll up your sleeves and get things done. I do not like my house out of order, I work hard to have decent things in my home, and it seems as if nobody cares but me. I will be planning a family meeting to come up with a plan that works for the household. I am not a super clean person, but I like to be able to open my door if I have unexpected guest. For the past week, I would have had to meet guest on the porch. People are cooking and not washing their dishes. Taking showers not straightening up the bathroom. Enough said!!!
Today at lunch, I went to Michael’s and got some organizers for my bedroom. I am doing things to make my small bedroom work efficiently. I have to do some special cleaning, Monica will be up this Saturday to celebrate her grandfather’s/Floyd 90th birthday. This will be big fun for the family. Floyd is a quiet giant, he is kind and thoughtful. Recently he has been ill. We want to celebrate his life with him. It is a surprise. After the dinner, we will hang out and do some catch up. I love my cousins, I did not have sisters and my female cousins served as my sisters. Monica is special in that she was the first grandchild to Floyd and Julia. She was Doris’ baby and we all love Doris. So we babied and spoiled Monica, I am about 10 or 12 years older than her, so when she was born me and Tree did some babysitting giving us an opportunity to bond. I look forward to this weekend. My mother use to love to prepare for Doris, Monica and Allen’s arrival. My mother was especially proud of Monica and Allen as they completed college. Allen has is PhD same as his dad. Doris their mother is my first cousin, making Allen and Monica my second cousin. I often joke with Monica by telling her that Doris, her mother, is my REAL cousin. Doris reminds me a lot of my mom, they are super caring people and they are the conflict solvers in the family. My mother and Doris were very very close. Doris like Monica was the first born to Julia and Floyd. My mother loved children so much, she spoiled Doris a lot as she grew up. Enough about my family.
On to healthly eating. I did not weigh in officially at True Image as I was at the hair salon Saturday at 7:00 a.m. Weekends have been difficult for me. I don’t over indulge but I don’t have a routine. Tonight is True Image and Zumba. Power Monday, my gym bag is in the car and I am ready. Ready to Burn !
Yes, It’s Monday and I’m not complaining. I thank the Lord everyday for my job. With the changes government are making our agency is funded by public monies. I feel confident that we will survive, our agency has been aggressive in the last 5 years of turning our mom and pop agency into a corporation. Word on the street has it that if funds are cut drastically they have targeted 18 positions that would be cut first. One of our programs will be cut in June, contract will not be renewed. I pray that God will open other doors for these employees. Life has taught me that we have to be prepared to accept God’s will in our lives. We have to listen to God and see how He would have us proceed. I feel blessed that I have been at this agency for 17 years.
Yesterday I lost my temper, I was so angry. My kitchen and entire house was a mess. Lots of grown people in the house, but I feel I am the only one keeping the house in order. I do not like to lose my temper, it is so ugly. I do not like laziness and I am beginning to feel like the house keeper. This is not a good feeling. I like cooperation, join in, roll up your sleeves and get things done. I do not like my house out of order, I work hard to have decent things in my home, and it seems as if nobody cares but me. I will be planning a family meeting to come up with a plan that works for the household. I am not a super clean person, but I like to be able to open my door if I have unexpected guest. For the past week, I would have had to meet guest on the porch. People are cooking and not washing their dishes. Taking showers not straightening up the bathroom. Enough said!!!
Today at lunch, I went to Michael’s and got some organizers for my bedroom. I am doing things to make my small bedroom work efficiently. I have to do some special cleaning, Monica will be up this Saturday to celebrate her grandfather’s/Floyd 90th birthday. This will be big fun for the family. Floyd is a quiet giant, he is kind and thoughtful. Recently he has been ill. We want to celebrate his life with him. It is a surprise. After the dinner, we will hang out and do some catch up. I love my cousins, I did not have sisters and my female cousins served as my sisters. Monica is special in that she was the first grandchild to Floyd and Julia. She was Doris’ baby and we all love Doris. So we babied and spoiled Monica, I am about 10 or 12 years older than her, so when she was born me and Tree did some babysitting giving us an opportunity to bond. I look forward to this weekend. My mother use to love to prepare for Doris, Monica and Allen’s arrival. My mother was especially proud of Monica and Allen as they completed college. Allen has is PhD same as his dad. Doris their mother is my first cousin, making Allen and Monica my second cousin. I often joke with Monica by telling her that Doris, her mother, is my REAL cousin. Doris reminds me a lot of my mom, they are super caring people and they are the conflict solvers in the family. My mother and Doris were very very close. Doris like Monica was the first born to Julia and Floyd. My mother loved children so much, she spoiled Doris a lot as she grew up. Enough about my family.
On to healthly eating. I did not weigh in officially at True Image as I was at the hair salon Saturday at 7:00 a.m. Weekends have been difficult for me. I don’t over indulge but I don’t have a routine. Tonight is True Image and Zumba. Power Monday, my gym bag is in the car and I am ready. Ready to Burn !
Friday, April 29, 2011
He Lives !
Hello, It’s me Again, Vanessa!
I want to thank the Lord for a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful Resurrection Sunday. I know it is now August 29th and Resurrection Sunday was last week. I am grateful to God for presenting our congregation with the wonderful performance. It touched on a lot and spoke to me. The entire weekend was blessed. Again, I thank you Lord.
I have not blogged since last week. I have not been on my regular schedule of blogging, logging in on calorie count and I have only been drinking 5 glasses of water per day. I am aware that I am off course; I have not and do not plan to beat up on myself. I continued to workout and my eating has been ok. The craziest thing is that Zumba was cancelled for this past Monday night. Bummer! But the best thing ever is that we will now have Zumba two times a week at 7:30 p.m. starting next week. Yes! Yes! Yes! I am aware of the change of the last week and I have begun to gradually get back on track. I weighed in this morning and I had lost 1 lbs. Total of 24 pounds. Thank You Lord for your Favor, Grace and Mercy. Weighing in this morning began my journey back. I was so grateful, so very grateful.
My work life has been great; our supervisor went for a much needed vacation. She works so hard she needed this time off to rest and be with her children. I pray she comes in feeling renewed.
Foods; Resurrection Sunday, I ate at my aunt’s house. Right ! It was the bomb ! Candied yams, baked chicken, collard greens, cornbread, ginger ale and PEACH COBBLER. Yes, PEACH COBBLER. You know I ate what was on my plate, oh yes, and there was boiled corn J I ate and did not worry, I had two servings of PEACH COBBLER which is equalent (sp) to my mother’s sweet potato pie recipe. God does give us what we want sometimes, He is good like that. I enjoyed being with family and being with them helped me to get through the holiday. Easter was also important to my mother and father. I have tons of memories !!!! She use to dress me and herself up like princesses. My father was a very sharp dresser. We all loved to eat and we would either go out or my mom would cook. Yesterday, I found a photo of Chris at about age 10 all dressed up in a green suit. At that age, he loved suits. He wanted a red suit, NOT ! But this Easter Jayden was “Clean as the Board of Health” (voice of Olivia Dunlap). Jayden is a character with so much personality. I will try and upload his photo ! All I can say he is gma’s lil man. He shows he has swaggert at 16 months, I think he gets his cool from me, he was styling in his shades. YES, his own shades. I know, I know, this is Resurrection Sunday not a style show. Lord knows I appreciate his dying on the cross for my sins. I will never, ever forget, what he done for me !
Until my next Blog, Peace be with you!
This is my pamper me weekend! Hairdo tonight ! Nique is treating me to ½ of the cost of my hairdo. What a blessing! Kids! I will do my own mani, pedi and facial. Summer is coming and coats come off and sandals slide on. I may do another makeup haul this weekend. Maybe !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I ordered a couple products from Amazon, but some things I have to see up front and in person.
One more thing, Ariel and I took Jayden to the park for his first official swing and slide adventure. At first he was hesitant, he was not sure about the swing, he kept saying “bye bye” meaning get me out of here. I know at that time he wished he had more words J the slide he loved.
I want to thank the Lord for a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful Resurrection Sunday. I know it is now August 29th and Resurrection Sunday was last week. I am grateful to God for presenting our congregation with the wonderful performance. It touched on a lot and spoke to me. The entire weekend was blessed. Again, I thank you Lord.
I have not blogged since last week. I have not been on my regular schedule of blogging, logging in on calorie count and I have only been drinking 5 glasses of water per day. I am aware that I am off course; I have not and do not plan to beat up on myself. I continued to workout and my eating has been ok. The craziest thing is that Zumba was cancelled for this past Monday night. Bummer! But the best thing ever is that we will now have Zumba two times a week at 7:30 p.m. starting next week. Yes! Yes! Yes! I am aware of the change of the last week and I have begun to gradually get back on track. I weighed in this morning and I had lost 1 lbs. Total of 24 pounds. Thank You Lord for your Favor, Grace and Mercy. Weighing in this morning began my journey back. I was so grateful, so very grateful.
My work life has been great; our supervisor went for a much needed vacation. She works so hard she needed this time off to rest and be with her children. I pray she comes in feeling renewed.
Foods; Resurrection Sunday, I ate at my aunt’s house. Right ! It was the bomb ! Candied yams, baked chicken, collard greens, cornbread, ginger ale and PEACH COBBLER. Yes, PEACH COBBLER. You know I ate what was on my plate, oh yes, and there was boiled corn J I ate and did not worry, I had two servings of PEACH COBBLER which is equalent (sp) to my mother’s sweet potato pie recipe. God does give us what we want sometimes, He is good like that. I enjoyed being with family and being with them helped me to get through the holiday. Easter was also important to my mother and father. I have tons of memories !!!! She use to dress me and herself up like princesses. My father was a very sharp dresser. We all loved to eat and we would either go out or my mom would cook. Yesterday, I found a photo of Chris at about age 10 all dressed up in a green suit. At that age, he loved suits. He wanted a red suit, NOT ! But this Easter Jayden was “Clean as the Board of Health” (voice of Olivia Dunlap). Jayden is a character with so much personality. I will try and upload his photo ! All I can say he is gma’s lil man. He shows he has swaggert at 16 months, I think he gets his cool from me, he was styling in his shades. YES, his own shades. I know, I know, this is Resurrection Sunday not a style show. Lord knows I appreciate his dying on the cross for my sins. I will never, ever forget, what he done for me !
Until my next Blog, Peace be with you!
This is my pamper me weekend! Hairdo tonight ! Nique is treating me to ½ of the cost of my hairdo. What a blessing! Kids! I will do my own mani, pedi and facial. Summer is coming and coats come off and sandals slide on. I may do another makeup haul this weekend. Maybe !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I ordered a couple products from Amazon, but some things I have to see up front and in person.
One more thing, Ariel and I took Jayden to the park for his first official swing and slide adventure. At first he was hesitant, he was not sure about the swing, he kept saying “bye bye” meaning get me out of here. I know at that time he wished he had more words J the slide he loved.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Seeking Godly Words !
I continue to experience the love of God. He is the true living God. I appreciate God in my life and He gives me hope. Thank You Lord for your salvation.
Yesterday I took care of some important business. After the close, life altering losses in my life, I am working to plan. My mom planned for her home going throughout her life. She told me what to do in the event of her death, and I have learned from her example. She paid her insurance policies timely, she made sure me/family would have a home that was paid for upon her death. A few years before she passed she began to sell off her cherished furnishing and hats as she wanted to get the financial benefit of these objects. But she made sure I didn’t want them. She left me her most treasured piece of furniture old antique ice box which is priceless. I had always had my mom as my beneficiary in the event I passed away first. Now that she is gone, I had to change mine. I did it, because I want have to prepare a will and a living will with directives for my medical care if need be. It is what my mom taught me. I decide who to leave my polices to. Yesterday I did this, I made a decision and left it at that. This is a relief. Dominique and Jayden to have a bit of security. I want them to be able to bury me without the stress of not having insurance in their name. I wanted to put the policy together as if it were a will, spelling out my desires of how and when Jayden’s part would be spent. But I was not able to, so I am trusting God and his mother to do the right thing.
I blog/journel because it gives me an outlet to express myself. As a therapist I understand and appreciate the importance of getting it out and dealing with the problem. But realistically it is difficult for me. I will often take the hurt instead of passing it on to the deserving person. It gives me an opportunity to get things out. I am not real good about getting things out. Especially in my interpersonal relationships. I often want to say things but fear I will hurt other’s feelings. So then I walk around carrying stuff/junk. I am asking God to give me tactful/Godly words. I promised myself in 2011 I would take care of me, and do things that are important for me. I would say I have been 60/40 on this. I want to be tactful/Godly in using my words, when I keep things in for so long when it comes out it often doesn’t sound good. I need to make baby steps on using my Godly words.
Yesterday’s workout was good. Camille is our Tuesday evening instructor. She was disappointed that our music system was not functioning properly. Even though it was not she still managed to give us a good workout. My heartbeat was definitely up. I was able to do all my crunches, even the ones when you hold your legs straight up. YEAH. My suicides were not as good, but I did as many as I could. I actually did 2 45 minutes planks, which use to kill my left shoulder. I modified them. They are excellent for building core muscles. EXCELLENT.
Foods and water intake yesterday could have been better. Five glasses of water instead of 8. I also had a few two many Doritos with my turkey taco. Everything else was cool, plenty of fruit, Jayden and I shared an apple, and he loves apples, oranges and banana. Not as much banana, I think his favorite is orange slices. I usually keep my fruit in my bedroom, so I can reach them quickly. He loves to find them and tear into them. This is good. He also likes the steamed veggies.
Today’s eating is good: breakfast, two boiled egg whites, coffee with ½ and ½. Lunch: Progresso 70 calorie a cup soup, and an apple. Not very hungry, I think yesterday’s Doritos are still in my system J
I see Ms. Juanita this evening after work. I need to be freshened up. My do is hit, my workouts wipe my hair out. I even wrap it but sweat still affects the hair, and it is if there is a build up of cakeiness. YUCK ! I am sure I will feel like a Queen when I leave her chair. She works magic on me.
Yesterday I took care of some important business. After the close, life altering losses in my life, I am working to plan. My mom planned for her home going throughout her life. She told me what to do in the event of her death, and I have learned from her example. She paid her insurance policies timely, she made sure me/family would have a home that was paid for upon her death. A few years before she passed she began to sell off her cherished furnishing and hats as she wanted to get the financial benefit of these objects. But she made sure I didn’t want them. She left me her most treasured piece of furniture old antique ice box which is priceless. I had always had my mom as my beneficiary in the event I passed away first. Now that she is gone, I had to change mine. I did it, because I want have to prepare a will and a living will with directives for my medical care if need be. It is what my mom taught me. I decide who to leave my polices to. Yesterday I did this, I made a decision and left it at that. This is a relief. Dominique and Jayden to have a bit of security. I want them to be able to bury me without the stress of not having insurance in their name. I wanted to put the policy together as if it were a will, spelling out my desires of how and when Jayden’s part would be spent. But I was not able to, so I am trusting God and his mother to do the right thing.
I blog/journel because it gives me an outlet to express myself. As a therapist I understand and appreciate the importance of getting it out and dealing with the problem. But realistically it is difficult for me. I will often take the hurt instead of passing it on to the deserving person. It gives me an opportunity to get things out. I am not real good about getting things out. Especially in my interpersonal relationships. I often want to say things but fear I will hurt other’s feelings. So then I walk around carrying stuff/junk. I am asking God to give me tactful/Godly words. I promised myself in 2011 I would take care of me, and do things that are important for me. I would say I have been 60/40 on this. I want to be tactful/Godly in using my words, when I keep things in for so long when it comes out it often doesn’t sound good. I need to make baby steps on using my Godly words.
Yesterday’s workout was good. Camille is our Tuesday evening instructor. She was disappointed that our music system was not functioning properly. Even though it was not she still managed to give us a good workout. My heartbeat was definitely up. I was able to do all my crunches, even the ones when you hold your legs straight up. YEAH. My suicides were not as good, but I did as many as I could. I actually did 2 45 minutes planks, which use to kill my left shoulder. I modified them. They are excellent for building core muscles. EXCELLENT.
Foods and water intake yesterday could have been better. Five glasses of water instead of 8. I also had a few two many Doritos with my turkey taco. Everything else was cool, plenty of fruit, Jayden and I shared an apple, and he loves apples, oranges and banana. Not as much banana, I think his favorite is orange slices. I usually keep my fruit in my bedroom, so I can reach them quickly. He loves to find them and tear into them. This is good. He also likes the steamed veggies.
Today’s eating is good: breakfast, two boiled egg whites, coffee with ½ and ½. Lunch: Progresso 70 calorie a cup soup, and an apple. Not very hungry, I think yesterday’s Doritos are still in my system J
I see Ms. Juanita this evening after work. I need to be freshened up. My do is hit, my workouts wipe my hair out. I even wrap it but sweat still affects the hair, and it is if there is a build up of cakeiness. YUCK ! I am sure I will feel like a Queen when I leave her chair. She works magic on me.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
What's happening with me !!
Praise the Lord !
I am thankful for all of God’s blessing ! He has kept me, shield me and fought my battles. He is a mighty warrior and I trust Him. He continues to bless me and I am working hard to listen and be obedient to his Word. God’s love is so awesome, it embraces me and keeps me breathing and seeking Him.
I have not blogged in a few days. I have been busy with work. My responsibility has grown so much. I am working to be a good servant in my workplace and to be obedient and helpful. The Lord has helped me to keep my mouth shut and stay in peace and allow him to work things out. And He has !!!!!! I come in with an attitude to get the job done and to get it done well.
My workouts have been fantastic. I was able to do 5 workouts last week including Zumba. Yesterday was Power Monday, I did my True Image workout and Zumba. I feel so encouraged when I complete both. It starts my week off with a BANG. Takeema came, it was helpful to have her at my side. She is such an amazing young woman. We all continue to encourage one another. This past Saturday, I dropped two more pounds, grand total 23 pounds since March 1. This is God’s work ! God gets the glory at every workout and every meal. I continue to ask God to get me through my workout and to take my greedy food eating spirit away. It is a process, day by day, meal by meal, workout by workout. On Saturday most of the ladies came out feeling quite successful. We encouraged one another and shared some of our To Do things for this life style change.
Jayden is something else. He has so much energy and personality. He likes to play rough and now he is roughing it with me. I give him piggy back rides. He has discovered that he has a tummy and that granny has a big stomach, and he likes to poke it J Ariel will begin work Thursday and he will begin going to a babysitter. Pray that he will transition and do well. Dominique is much better, she is blessed.
Food : I am staying below my 1,200 calorie intake. Which is helping me lose. I am careful to eat proteins and veggies. Calorie Count has been helpful, I log my foods and activity. Logging each food item helps me see the calories in each item. I was definitely putting some high calories items into my salads, for example chick peas. They had more calories than the chick peas were worth. So I cancelled the chick peas. There was another items I deleted but I can’t remember. I also checked on my dressings and changed to the French low calorie dressing, which I love. I usually mix two dressings.
New Goal: I have met my level 1 goal at True Image and I am moving on to Level 2. My first goal was to lose 20 lbs. Guess what? My new goal is to lose another 20 lbs. I am 3 pounds into my new goal. 17 more lbs to reach the next level. The long term goal is
for me to lose about 60 lbs then I will be a Level 4 meaning I can begin to incorporate more foods, less weekly workouts required and my monthy fees are cut to ½ price. It is a win/win.
I am thankful for all of God’s blessing ! He has kept me, shield me and fought my battles. He is a mighty warrior and I trust Him. He continues to bless me and I am working hard to listen and be obedient to his Word. God’s love is so awesome, it embraces me and keeps me breathing and seeking Him.
I have not blogged in a few days. I have been busy with work. My responsibility has grown so much. I am working to be a good servant in my workplace and to be obedient and helpful. The Lord has helped me to keep my mouth shut and stay in peace and allow him to work things out. And He has !!!!!! I come in with an attitude to get the job done and to get it done well.
My workouts have been fantastic. I was able to do 5 workouts last week including Zumba. Yesterday was Power Monday, I did my True Image workout and Zumba. I feel so encouraged when I complete both. It starts my week off with a BANG. Takeema came, it was helpful to have her at my side. She is such an amazing young woman. We all continue to encourage one another. This past Saturday, I dropped two more pounds, grand total 23 pounds since March 1. This is God’s work ! God gets the glory at every workout and every meal. I continue to ask God to get me through my workout and to take my greedy food eating spirit away. It is a process, day by day, meal by meal, workout by workout. On Saturday most of the ladies came out feeling quite successful. We encouraged one another and shared some of our To Do things for this life style change.
Jayden is something else. He has so much energy and personality. He likes to play rough and now he is roughing it with me. I give him piggy back rides. He has discovered that he has a tummy and that granny has a big stomach, and he likes to poke it J Ariel will begin work Thursday and he will begin going to a babysitter. Pray that he will transition and do well. Dominique is much better, she is blessed.
Food : I am staying below my 1,200 calorie intake. Which is helping me lose. I am careful to eat proteins and veggies. Calorie Count has been helpful, I log my foods and activity. Logging each food item helps me see the calories in each item. I was definitely putting some high calories items into my salads, for example chick peas. They had more calories than the chick peas were worth. So I cancelled the chick peas. There was another items I deleted but I can’t remember. I also checked on my dressings and changed to the French low calorie dressing, which I love. I usually mix two dressings.
New Goal: I have met my level 1 goal at True Image and I am moving on to Level 2. My first goal was to lose 20 lbs. Guess what? My new goal is to lose another 20 lbs. I am 3 pounds into my new goal. 17 more lbs to reach the next level. The long term goal is
for me to lose about 60 lbs then I will be a Level 4 meaning I can begin to incorporate more foods, less weekly workouts required and my monthy fees are cut to ½ price. It is a win/win.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Hump Day !
Hump Day ! Good Day ! Just Another Day that the Lord has blessed me. Just another day that the Lord has blessed me. Boy did my mom love that old hymn. I know now why she loved and appreciated this hymn. The Lord blesses me and keeps me from losing it. I ask him daily to give me peace and to keep my anxiety down. I know I suffer with depression and anxiety as my mother did. I know when I take care of God’s temple I feel so much better and so alive. I am blessed that the Lord blesses and gives us new mercies every day. It feels so good to know God loves me for who I am. I have tons and tons of paperwork to process. I will get it done, no doubt. I ask that the Lord give me what I need to do it and do it with a caring spirit. Our department is down a worker and so we are all taking on more assessments. My supervisor has done two already this week. We are trying to keep the beds full which helps the agency survive financially. Today is my off day from workout, it is my day to let my muscles relax. During our workout yesterday, we got DOWN. Camille work it out !!!!!!!!! Again we had so much energy. I modified the routine to the best of my ability. When I feel like giving up I ask God for strength and I get through. Cardio is so exciting, ab work is much needed, so I do it. Today’s weather is wonderful, it makes me appreciate God even more. I was actually able to wear my sunglasses J I continue to experiment with self improvement things to help boost my self esteem. Eating: Breakfast: orange, coffee/creamer Lunch: Progresso Traditional Barley Soup (160 calories). Lunch was delicious and warm.
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