Does victim mean weakness?

Today was an enjoyable day. With God in the lead I was able to do God's will. I was able to help others and be helped by others. I struggle with others helping me, I do not like being the victim in any situation. My last view years has made me a victim to tragedy and loss. I see now that pride gets in my way of allowing others to help me. I step in and want to save others all the time. But when others want to help me I shutdown or ignore the help. I press on in misery carrying a heavy load. God put other's in my path to help me.

I have interpreted being a victim as being weak. I admire strongness in people and prefer to be strong. Accepting words of encouragement and support from others is not weakness, it is God's way of showing me love.

My work as a social worker prepared me to help others. Growing up as a minister's daughter taught me to help others. Watching my mother serve others taught me to help others. My life has been built on helping others.

Today I had prepared a salad for my lunch, had low fat mac and cheese from trader Joe's for lunch. Special K berries for breakfast. Dinner was curry rice with lobster. I had a few mint cookies for desert. Perrier water is now new found treasure (delicious). I have not had Pepsi since the first week of January. Red meat and pork are out of my diet. Lord help me to continue on this path. I need your help Lord and the support of others.

I write this blog to get my feelings out. Maybe it will help others.