Stuck in Stupid

Breaking Strongholds

Lord Lord Lord !!  I cry out to You for help, for relief and guidance.  Lord You know my concerns like no other.  Give me a renewed spirit, I am working to build my relationship with You Lord and things are hitting me right and left.  Give me the strength to face my situations and move.  I need to move, I don’t want to become stuck.  Lord help me.  Give me the words I need to say and to say them in a kind and productive manner.  Lord I need You !  I love You and realize I can not go through this without You.  Thank You !

This weekend I was stuck in stupid for the most part.  I have some life changing situations going on that are SO overwhelming.  When I get like this I either shutdown or I move forward.  This weekend I chose to be stuck in my stupidiness and not look to God, remaining home all day on Sunday with the covers over my head.  Yeah !  Now I need to be in the House of the Lord during this time, but I couldn’t move.  But how is it I moved to go to work today.  I struggle with this.  The Lord has been so good to me and yet I shut Him out of my heart and don’t give of myself.  I have to serve God during the good times and the bad times.  I know this, but Sunday morning I could not move.  I am gradually falling, slipping into where I don’t want to be.  I know this and I am asking God to help me keep my focus and Trust that He will bring me through.  Although yesterday I did make an important phone call which will help me move forward.  I felt very positive about the situation and will be following up this week.  I put things off until it becomes dangerous and toxic in my life.  I have always had this problem but since my losses it is to the point of being really toxic.  It is a serious stronghold.  One of which I must come from under.   Lord I am asking forgiveness for all of my stupidiness and for not being responsible. 

On Friday my blog was about organization, on that very day my thoughts and life were so disorganized I could barely write.  I know the importance of order but I have not been applying it properly.  I am going through the motions of appearing ok on the outside but on the inside I am a wreck.  My emotions for the past few months have been a wreck and my house is a wreck.  Outwardly I appear cool, but I am a mess.  God has been the factor holding me together, if I did not trust in the Lord I don’t know where I would be.  Really.  I am rebuilding my life and entering a new chapter. God has plans for me and I know this but things are happening to mess with my spirit to take me off course.  I am so glad to be back to this blog to write and get things out of me.  Now that my Mac is working, I will be able to write more, I lost my power cord and I am waiting for a delivery from Amazon for a new one.  Then I should be able to blog on the weekend.  On Friday I had my hand on my phone to call off but I knew if I stayed at home alone I would run myself crazy with thoughts.  It was the best decision ever, I was able to mingle with coworkers to keep my mind off issues.  So I know I should have done the same on Sunday, the people of God are my family and I should have been there.

I do feel so much better.  Thank You Lord for Your help.

Updates:  I will be turning over my guest blog to gonegirlgo this week.  So look forward to going over and reading it at gonegirlgo.blogspot.com.  I will keep you posted on the day in which it is uploaded.  On Saturday, I attended one of several sessions for the gonegirlgo movement.  What I walked away with was that I need to keep moving forward with my passion and purpose. I was able to be with other women who have the same desire to move.  Very encouraging.

Also on Saturday I met with a girlfriend who is beginning to put her dream of opening a food service company, which will education on the principle of healthy eating, preparation.  I was able to help her design her first set of business cards.  It was really nice to be able to help her in this manner.  So many people are helping me that I see the importance of sharing my gifts to help and support her. 

Monday is an important day for me because it starts off my week.  Also important because I met with the team of Tenth Talent Media and we work on our plan.  It is such an exciting experience. 

I have homework all over the place.  WOW my power cord has just arrived.  It’s On !  I have my tool my Mac.  The Mac is totally Back and operational.

I will be able to outline my homework for Tenth Talent and gonegirlgo.  YES YES YES

Thank You Jesus !  

Getting Organized

Getting Organized

Lord thank You for allowing me to get us this morning and deal with things !!!! I thank You for giving me Peace during this storm.  Guide me as I need You to hold my hand Lord.  Remove any feelings of anxiety I am trusting You Lord.

Yesterday was a good day.  Our Life Group met and the ladies are wonderful.  We began to do planning for the upcoming year.  We got excellent feedback and we will incorporate some of their suggestions as we can.  One of the members brought a good Walking Video where we were able to do 1 mile it was really good.  I had never done any of these Video, I was able to do it with my healing foot.  I may invest in one of these tapes.

Today I am really not in the mood to write, this rarely happens.  But I have some things on my mind that I am not clearly dealing with.  I will keep it in prayer, knowing that God will get me through.  As he has done in my past.  I believe God to do miracles and show mercy.  Lord help me keep moving. 

Good things have been planned for me so I will continue to move in the direction of good. I will see you all the next time I blog.

Beatuy:  I picked up two organizers for my makeup.  They were on sale for 5 bucks each.  I will continue to organize my items and get things in order.  

Getting ready to STEP OUT

Lord Jesus I thank You for renewing me today.  I thank You for this as You so know I needed Your strength.  Lord You are the love of my life.  Your love is every present in my life.  Lord continue to give me what I need to move forward in my life.  I want to always come before You humble and with thanksgiving.  I want to be forever grateful to You. 

I have been invited to write a blog for gonegirlgo.  I excited but nervous.  This would be stepping out of my box, my comfort zone.  Because I never really promote my blog, I write it to express myself and if someone is blessed by it, that’s cool.  But NOW I will be featured on her blog which will be exposing my blog.  This is a good thing; this is a part of God’s plan for me and a big part of my passion and purpose.  So I am preparing my write up and also my team is working to put a new face on this blog.  Yes it will have a new look.  You know how it is, when you are expecting company and you get things together around the house, well, we are doing the same.  The plan was to update the look anyway, but we decided to go ahead and do it now.  Please keep me in prayer.  I work to be transparent when it will effect and bless others.  So now my words will be put into action.  I so believe in the gonegirlgo movement and as I am a part of the movement I am excited to watch things unfold for all of us.  I will post the date so you can go on over to her site and check it out. 

Yesterday, was a decent day for me.  Meaning no major drama.  It was a day of peace and harmony.  Things were simple for me.  I got things taken care of.  I have plans for the weekend.  This is Relationship Night, I so look forward to the Friday nights that we meet.  I just got a text from someone wanting a ride and it reminded me that it is coming.  People that I know are in need of Relationship work and are coming out in search of the Word.  Exciting. Exciting.  The church were the sessions are is a small and upcoming church, filled with people of liked minds all wanting to be blessed and to bless others.

Black Opal Stick Cream Foundation

Beauty: This morning as I did my makeup I reached for my Black Opal stick (cream) foundation.  This foundation is the bomb.  Why do I even bother with the high end stuff.  I think I make myself believe high end is better.  But this foundation gives me medium coverage and it adds a ice warmth to my skin without the redness some of my foundations have.  Now I will continue to use my high end foundations because I have them, but I will incorporate using my Black Opal more on a daily. 

Exercise:  None – still waiting for my doctor’s appointment next Tuesday.  But today I did not wear my boot, I wore a pair of flats.  My right foot is a tad bid bigger than my left, so I had to make a small slit in the canvas flat.  I might take a walk tonight with the ladies in the Life Group.  But I will go at a regular pace.

The Mac is Back

Excellent Customer Service Goes Along Way

Jesus I am grateful to You for who You are in my life.  I thank You daily for Your and protection. You are so gracious.  You show Your love to me in so many ways.  Lord strengthens me and keeps me strong.  When I am weak please move me along in the direction You have mapped out for me.  Lord protects and blesses my family and friends.  Thank You Jesus.

Yesterday I took my Mac Book to the Apple, I had been procrastinating on taking it in.  I get like that sometimes.  I had been using my Kindle Fire and really felt I didn’t need it. They repaired it in a matter of minutes.  The Apple team is one of the BEST customer service models I have EVER experienced.  From the time you walk into the door until you leave the staff extend themselves to you working to meet Your needs.  In all that they did to rescue my Mac there no funds exchanged, they such wanted to know my laptop was in tiptop shape and that I was satisfied.  Hats off to Apple. Boy did I want an IPad but I don’t have a need for one, so I walked right on up out of that place. And what I liked was that they didn’t even try to encourage me to get one, no pushiness, it was amazing.  They took care of what I needed and asked of them. Now that my Mac is Back I will be able to do better with blogging.  I may even be able to weekend blog.  I will see.

Now I need a power cord, I can’t find mine, but I think my Ms. Ariel may have it LOL

A new one is about 80 bucks, even if I get what I need from Amazon with shipping it comes to about 77 bucks.  The laptop is working but I can’t use it.  Aweeeeeeeeee   I wanted to work on something last night and I only had 8 % battery.  But the good thing is that I took it in and the MAC is BACK. My Mac is the most efficient piece of technology that I have ever possessed.  Well my smart phone is pretty slick too.

Newly Ordained Ministers NCBF - Praise God Praise God

 

Yesterday, on FB I uploaded a picture of the newly ordained ministers at NCBF.  What a wonderful snapshot.  These men of God serve our needs with such kindness and patience.  I celebrate their accomplishment and all that God has planned in their lives.  I bless their families as these men of God work to serve others.  NCBF is doing an excellent job at Kingdom building.  They are working in their purpose.

Exercise:  I am in need of it; my body is craving the feeling.  I feel so much better about myself when I am working out.  My foot is better, but yesterday I felt some pain way deep down inside.  I don’t want to mess my foot up further.  In my head I feel soooooooooooooo FAT.  That FAT feeling never leaves my head, and now it is intensified.  I feel like I am doing nothing, at a stand still.  I like the support of my True Image team and miss my workouts.  I miss power walking, I miss my treadmill, and I miss everything.  I am working really hard to eat in moderation.  But at times I feel down and this makes me want to eat.  It is such a vicious cycle.  Lord I am praying that You bless me in this time of my journey.  

The A Team

Ready to fight a good cause 

Lord You are so merciful and such a protector.  You give me such peace in time of my storms.  You let me know You are God and that You have good plans for me.  Lord I thank You for blessing me yesterday above what could have been evil.  You guarded my heart and rushed in to give me peace.  Thank You for wonderful friends who are being used to be your vessels.  Thank You ! 

Yesterday I had that moment when you get the phone call.  You know when you see the name in the caller ID there may be trouble.  My heart fell !  I relived the feeling when I got the call about Chris and then my mother.  My heart went into a panic and I began to pace.  I was with friends so they immediately calmed me down.  At that moment I felt God’s presence.  Saying trust me.  I began to think the situation out.  And going into my rational thinking I was able to conclude that everything was ok.  You see I have an outer entrance basement door to my house.  My cousin called me from the house saying my basement door was wide open.  So you know we both were thinking robbery and are they still in there.  But at the moment my friend assured me things were ok, I remembered I had not locked the door behind the furnace man.  And if you live in Cleveland you know yesterday was cold and very WINDY.  The wind had blown the door open.  So I felt assured on the ride over that it was no robbery and that it was an oversight on my part.  Praise God !  But then the enemy was not finished messing with my head.  He began to tell me there could be raccoons or squirrels now inside the house.  Oh boy !  Again my friend assured me that her husband could handle any little wild animal.   She named us the A Team.  Yeah you know the retro show from the 70s.  So we got our courage together and marched right on into the house.  And it everything was FINE.  Yes FINE !!  Such a blessed situation.  We had no fear God has us.

I say all this to say TRUST GOD !  I know we may initially go right to the worse case scenario but why over stress ourselves and fill ourselves with anxiety.  Anxiety means that for those few seconds I was not totally trusting God.  My mind went right to self pity mode of why me ?  why me ? Why me ?  And it was so unnecessary.  Trusting God makes facing SITUATIONS of life so much more peaceful.

I am feeling so blessed. 

After work I plan to put my Mac into the Apple store, it is not performing as it should.  I have been putting it off.  But I need to be able to work my from laptop.  After this I have dinner plans with a friend who needs some career advice.  She is a sweetie.  Saturday I will be attending gonegirlgo to move further in the movement.  EXCITED.  Saturday afternoon, I will be helping a friend make some business cards as she is launching a catering service.  I enjoy working on projects that help women move toward their goals.

Friday evening is Relationship Night, I am excited my guest will be returning with me and I have invited another friend and her husband.  The presenter Pastor Jackson of Way of Life Gospel sent a email this morning saying he has a special word for the men. 

GNO - Think Like a Man

Really good cast of characters

Lord here I am again. Asking You to forgive me of my sins.  Lord help me in the areas of my weakness.  Lord I confess my sins and want to be delivered. Lord allow me to break strongholds in my life.  Remind me of who You are and how You have carried me in my journey.  Lord You have never given me more than I can bear.  You provided me with what I needed to heal.  Lord help me as I continue to heal.  You don’t give me more than I can bear, and You strengthen me daily.  Grow me up Lord !

I had enjoyable weekend, I work to do things on the weekend that are enjoyable.  Such as hang  out with family and friends.  On Friday evening I hung out with a lot of ladies at our Girls Night Out (GNO), Lori S. coordinate our events and keeps us together as a group.  This month we went to the opening night for Think Like a Man, Act Like a Lady.  I invited some of my girls to join the group and some of them were able to attend.  The movie was hilarious, a romantic comedy, which are my favorite. Totally hilarious, now this is only my opinion and the opinion of the people in the theatre.  Some of the movies I couldn’t hear because of laughter in the theatre. I won’t go into great detail because I don’t want to give it away.  There were a few surprise characters  in the film also.  But if you want to laugh go.  So on Saturday I went to the movie again with family.  Yeah it was funny.  I took Ariel, Jayden to dinner for Ariel’s birthday which was a week ago.  Shelby who is Jayden’s God mother joined us.  We had good food and conversation.  Jayden is a riot.  He likes to be funny and make you laugh.  He is talking so clearly it is good to engage in a conversation with him.  I have some photos of his bedroom at “MY MOMMY HOUSE”. 

Jayden's room at HIS MOMMY'S HOUSE LOL

Saturday morning I attended Seed Team, where we learn about the direction of the church and there is an educational component.  The church is really growing in a positive way.  Evangelism is a big component, good Kingdom building.  While I was there I got to meet Ilene from the Care Ministry, she has been such a blessing to me as my foot heals.  She is an amazing woman and from our talks on the phone a friendship has development.  She likes to workout and we plan to do some walking at The Creek.  Throughout this journey I  have worked to stay positive and see the good in all this.  

Beauty:  I have been doing some research on hair styles and cuts.  I really like the bob look, and think I have found the look.  It is simply chic.  Nothing fussy, but it has body, I do like body.  

Amazing Work of God

Steelcut Oatmeal with fresh blueberries, strawberries and almonds and my fav ice coffee

Lord you never cest to AMAZE me.  Your wisdom far exceeds anything that I could ever image.  You place me where I need to be when I need to be there.  You so loving take care of me.  It amazes me that You know me better than I know myself.  You surround me with people that care about me and that are being used as vessels in my journey.  I pray that I am also a blessing to them.  Lord I thank You for this.  You are magnificent and so Holy.  Yes Yes Yes

Yesterday served as another day of You showing me and laying out my path.  I was ministered to in an awesome way by a woman of God.  It is such an amazing work of God when He uses someone to pour into you.  I am grateful for having the spiritual discernment to know who I can share with.  During our conversation she had words that went along the lines of what God is already setting up for me.  I am a funny type person, I will blog/journal away, but my one on one dialogue is limited.  God allowed me to open up and share some things.  I am having to open up and share more during this part of my journey which is awesome. 

Big News – EXERCISE – yesterday evening I went for a short walk, being really careful to my foot.  My foot received it well and there was no swelling, nothing abnormal.  Today it is fine, now I will gradually go back into my exercise.  Maybe I will walk tomorrow at some point for 10 or 15 minutes.  I am so grateful to God for giving me patience and the strength to move forward.  It felt so good and rewarding. 

Food: See photo above (breakfast) - lunch beef roast, yam, salad, and broccilli, dinner will be the same.  

After I got home I received a call from a new fellow “no sugar no flour” member.  It was so refreshing to hear her new excitement for the program.  I remember when I was brand new and I was receiving this tool as a gift from God.  Such peace !  I am so pleased she is working the program. 

I have not been physically active in working out in about a month.  So after this short walk I must have been exhausted, because when I settled in I fell asleep quickly.  

OHhhhh my weekend :  Friday : Steve Harvey movie, tonight with the girls.  Me and my girls going with a larger group of ladies for our once a month Girl Night Out.  We have fun in our fellowship of good, clean fun.  Lots of laughter. Yesterday Tyler Perry sent out an email encouraging his followers to go out and see the movie.  That touched me in a special way.  Me being the crazy woman who I am tried to respond to Tyler and tell him that was nice, but of course, it was a no reply email.  LOL   Saturday:  Seed Team - in the Word  Saturday;  Out to dinner for Ariel's birthday celebration, family and friends it will be fun.  Can't wait to see what stuff Jayden is gonna come up with on this adventure.  Most of his leading ladies will be there; mama, grandma, auntie and Godmother.  Sunday:  NCBF - worship service, pick up some groceries and do some house work to prepare for the coming week :)  

I had wanted to go see Minister Myron's short film, but it is during work hours so I will not be able to go :(  Hopefully he will have a showing for those that want to support his work.

Inner Beauty

Lord I love You !  Please forgive me for my sins.  As I now sit here with things festering that should not be I ask You to forgive me.  Lord help me show your love and express kindness.  Lord hold my tongue, let the words that flow from it be worthy and express words of encouragement and kindness.  Let me be a person that brings forth peace, love and kindness.  Work on me in this area as I rely on You and need You in this area of my life.  Let me desire goodness for myself and others.  Let me sow seeds of kindness and generosity.  Open my heart to forgive and move forward.  I trust You Lord.  Lord thank You for dying on the cross for my sins, I thank You.  Thank You ! Amen !

Yesterday was Good !  The day was productive and I accomplished some tasks that were of a priority.  I continue to grow in my walk with the Lord.  I know that it is a process which requires patience.  Right now I need to practice patience in the area of my fitness.  I am struggling with not being able to fully workout.  I know my foot was not broke by accident.  It was in God’s plan for me, slowing me down, allowing me time to be comfortable with whom I am.  Right now I feel so much of me is wrapped up in my outer image.  I have to dig deep and love the me inside, this time has given time to work on the inner me.  To work on getting some areas of my inner self more God like.  I had spent a lot of time getting physically fit and working on enhancing my look with makeup.  God wants me to get fit inside and enhance some of my character flaws.  Things that stand in my way of being a vessel for Him. 

Beauty:  Inner work is the hard stuff, even more difficult than physically working out.  I am being challenged to look in the mirror and see me.  Because what I am on the inside is really who I am.  I have to look at what I am projecting out of my heart.  What is my foundation ?  J  No Mac, no Makeup Forever, no Lancôme, no Smashbox foundations can cover up and enhance my inner self.  What is my foundation? Am I standing solid and being obedient to God’s word.  Or am I more worried about the how heels the shoes I am standing on are.  Is my heart, sweet, sincere, forgving ?  Is it as warm as my bronzer, bold to speak up for Christ as the boldness of my eyeliner ?  You see where this is going. 

God is using this time for me to begin to realize working on my inner stuff is just as important as my outer image.  You got to love the Lord J  Lord I hear You.  I serve a loving master.  One that wants me to be all I can be, one who knows there is more to me than my outer image.  One who wants me to be lovely as he formed me.  My experience of the broken foot will always remind me of God’s love for me. 

I know that likenesses attract and so I cannot expect to Boaz to be sent to me with messed up inside.  Knowing that likenesses attract I don’t know if I would REALLY want my likeness to approach me until I have worked through some of my inner stuff.  I get it, I get it.  J   I’m doing my homework J

Food:  This a.m. I made my routine breakfast, back on track with that.  It was good and it is way less expensive to have breakfast at home.  For what I paid for one morning breakfast at Stove Oven covers the cost of my breakfast at home for over 7 days.  Yeah ! 

I made some pork chops while I got dressed and baked a yam, I have salad leftovers in the frig at work.  I picked up some low sugar Ranch salad dressing on my drive in. 

Exercise:  This evening I will be leading Fit for the King life group. I have some nice daily meditations for the ladies and a nice food game.  Since the weather is nice we will go outside for a nice walk.  This will be my first walk.  I feel safe as I will be with a gang of women who love all over me and will make sure I don’t overdo it.  It will feel good.  I put my tennis shoes in the car to see if I can walk in them or use my boot. 

Major change: Relationship :  This is another relationship I am working to preserve.  The other relationship I am good.  Things are ok and no damage to the relationship.  Now, this is a new SITUATION.  Let me start by saying this is a relationship that has grown for years.  We have been supportive of one another in Big ways.  I believe a piece of my relationship with them needs to end.   I am doing some research and feel led to make this change.  Again it is not that deep.  It is just me and how I like things.  I need this taken care of to reduce my stress.  I am sorting it out in my mind and working to do it in a way which will not offend anyone.  Although I am disappointed in the some things I love the individual and want to make this change in a positive manner.  I still want to do what I need to do and leave the other person feeling good about them.  I learned this from hanging around with a Godly woman.  It is good to surround yourself with Godly people.   

Addictive Personality - Repin

Lord God I serve You with a heart of thanksgiving.  Appreciating all that You are.  You are magnificent in everything.  You are teaching me patience and trust.  For this I am grateful.   You guide me and led me.  Lord bless my family, keep them safe and out of harms way.  Give them the heart to serve You on a daily and help them to realize You are the way.  Allow my life to be an example.  Lord give me strength as I go out to do Your bidding.  Strength Lord.  When I am in doubt remove my doubts and fears.  Give me a mind focused on You.  I want to trust You in EVERYTHING !

My weight loss journey has not been easy.  I am an emotional eater, I eat to eat. For me being an emotional eater I eat when I am happy, sad it doesn’t matter.  I am not the type that feels down and turns from food, I run toward food.  The fattier, the sweeter, the breader I like it.  While I am eating it I stuff, stuff, stuff.  When I am finished there is guilt and shame tied up in my food.  These feelings turn inward and I begin to not like who I am, the woman God has uniquely formed.  I struggle with my foods and food choices. This morning I stopped again for breakfast.  I have not been in the mood to cook breakfast because I ran out of a couple of needed items.  Go figure, I time I spend picking up breakfast I could be picking up a carton of eggs and oatmeal.  Which I did pick up this morning J  Long story short, I stood there in line and debated, breakfast sandwich vs. steel cut oatmeal with fresh fruit.  I did make the healthier choice, but I really struggled with it.  When I follow my no sugar no flour plan as laid out, I have such peace with my food.  I need to get back to this place.  Today I planned a lunch according to the no sugar no flour plan.  Each meal I will approach in this manner until it is out of my system.  Lord I need Your help. 

Yesterday was a good day.  No major drama.  I had two things that stressed me, with God’s help I am getting through it and over it.  I have learned to sit back and see the bigger picture before I react.  I want to be careful not to harm others, but I still need to do what I need to do, without feeling like others’ are walking over me not caring about my situation.  Yesterday’s blog I mentioned a situation regarding a relationship in which I needed to handle something in a way in which God would be pleased and not hurt their feeling.  Today I am still festering in it, I hate when things fester in me.  I have spoken to the individual already today and the topic was not mentioned.  Avoidance that is me, big time.  I avoid to the point where I become passive aggressive. I might not say anything to you directly but it is there.  You will rarely ever see me angry, it’s something I don’t do outwardly, I suppress and then I overeat or go into other addictive behaviors.  I am working really hard to go to Jesus and give it to Him.  I know He will work it out, but my flesh so badly wants to let this person know who they are messing with J  But that’s not a relationship building mindset.  My choice in this matter will put a rip in our really good relationship.  So I have to really analysis how important is this relationship to me, how important is it to God that our paths continue.  Seeing it through God’s purpose keeps softens my heart.  Because our paths were brought together to do good for the Kingdom, no real other purpose.  Keep this in prayer with me.  It is important that I make the Godly choice.  What’s crazy is if you knew what all this was about, you would be like " girl you crazy it’s not that deep" J  It really helps putting it out there and sorting it out.  In the past this would have been a no brainer for me.  My response would have been so not nice.

I do know that I have an addictive personality.  I am a food addict, spending addict and most recently have become a Pinterest addict.  Yes it is so interesting to me. It is like an adult game in which I get to name and categorize things that I have interest.  When I see myself going in this direction I have focus on how is God receiving glory in my new found interest.  Right now I can’t think of any, if you think of any let me know.  It is good clean, enjoyable fun.  If you are already into Pinterest stop by and check out my various boards.  Go ahead and repin a few I don’t mind J

Beauty & Fashion:  Today is a beautiful day, I wore some fuchsia with black.  I wanted a pop of color.  I see Ms. Juanita(hair stylist)  this afternoon and I am so looking forward to it.  On Saturday I stopped in the CCO which sell discounted high end cosmetics and skin care.  Well I purchased a Mac lip stain and the thing is dried up already.  Lesson learned.  I have purchased lipsticks and foundations in the past from other CCO, but I will never get a stain.  You never know how long they have had merchandise. 

My boot will be coming off in two week.  I will at that time get myself a manicure and pedicure.  A nice treat. 

Exercise:  Haven’t I have been a bit careful about the foot.  I talk a good game, but I really don’t want to hurt my feet.  Since I broke my foot because who see me who have broken bones, walk up to me and say be careful you don’t want to rehurt it again.  SO…… and much as I want to I haven’t.  We will see what next week brings

Relationship Part II

Lord You give so freely Your Love.  You have been so kind to me.  Always providing, protecting and so able to handle my needs and some of my wants.  I am grateful for your loving spirit that resides in me.  I am grateful for You revealing things to me on a as I need to know.  Continue to give me patience through this journey.  Thank You for surrounding me with like mind worshippers.  Allow me to extend my love for You to the unbeliever or to those that are weak in their walk.  I thank You for trusting me to do Your bidding. 

Last evening I met with the Tenth Talent LLC, which is the production company.  It was a pleasure to be in the presence of a company that sole purpose is to glorify God.  To help artist bring forth that God giving gifts so that others may witness.  God has placed me there for the reason of bringing forth my testimony, my journey.  I am in preparation of going public with my day to day journey.  Some of my deepest thoughts and feelings are in these pages.  I do feel that there are those out there they have similar hurt and struggles so for this reason I push forward.  To bless others.  As I listen to Tenth Talent LLC communicate with one another they all are about blessing others.  God continues to prepare me as I discussed yesterday this past Saturday I attended a seminar Out of the Box – Out of Your Comfort Zone.  This workshop helped me to understand that it is ok to let my testimony go and to share it.  It helped me to realize that it had the possibility of helping others.  (by the way one of the partners husband makes a mean pork chop J, that’s enough about that). 

In this workshop we had to write down the things that would keep us from moving forward. 

My negatives were;

fear of failure, embarrassment (I embarrass easy J  ), what would others think, etc

My positives were;

Blessing myself and others, leaving a legacy, preserving my family memory in a honorable manner

So as you can see I have to move forward.  Sometimes just sitting down and having someone help your work through your stuff helps.

I need to give a shout out to Dawn Ja’Net Williams, CEO of It’s Who You Know for organizing this seminar and to the keynote speaker Terre Holmes, of Get Holmes Consulting LLC, she is a Life Coach and has done some amazing things in her life as far as stepping out of what was familiar in her life.  And of course, Zoe Brown, CEO of gonegirlgo was there to motivate and encourage.  These ladies are on facebook, check them out.  Zoe also writes a blog and has invited me to be a guest blogger on her blog.  So stay tuned !!  I like to acknowledge people and pay respect to individual who impact my life. 

Breakfast:  This morning I stopped at Stone Oven and got a bowl of steel cut oatmeal, with strawberries, almonds and blueberries.  It looked delicious, very colorful.  I took a photo to upload but my photo gallery is acting up.  I will upload it later.  I had a cup of Ice Coffee.  It was so nutritious, filling and satisfying.  I made the better choice because I really wanted the breakfast sandwich ( I don't need the bread).  The oatmeal had the fiber I needed and fresh fruit.  

Exercise:  Tonight I will walk my treadmill for 30 minutes, really slow, being really careful not to hurt my foot.  Pray !

Beauty:  Working on the inner beauty.  Show gratefulness to those that help you.  Thank You goes a long way.  Build positive relationships with others. It is easier getting along in positive relationships than hating, use your energy in good ways.  Appreciating others is my way of letting God know I appreciate what he has done for me.  

*** There is something I need to do later this week for someone that has been really good to me and looks out for me.  They need me to adjust my time to accomodate them this one time.  But something in me wants to get in a huff and push back, do I accomodate them or make a decision to do what I want to do, which will cause me some inconvenience. They have never really asked much in return for their time with me and patience.  I know I know I should inconvenience myself.  This is real stuff here.  This relationship is important to me !****  (you know I will do the right thing).  I had to work this out through writing, on my ride into work I was all worked up about it, I'm gonna tell her this and that and it went on and on.  And as I wrote about relationships her relationship with me popped in my head.  Lord You are awesome.

 

 Remember the fruits of the spirit.  Galatians 5:22-23

New International Version (NIV)

 ²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law

Peace Out !

BREAKING NEWS

BREAKING NEWS – My Pitty Party is Over

I GOT TO DO WHAT I GOT TO DO to get and keep me together 

OK this is my situation !  Not being able to physically exercise has been really bothering me, to the point of depression.  But not to the point where I get up and do something.  Now I could have been doing arm exercises and crutches.  Have I been NO !  I got to get my self up and do it !!! This is real stuff to me.  I know there are other issues more pressing in me and in the world, but right now right here, this is it.  

I have got to put a plan on paper, execute and hold myself accountable.

Treadmill daily – evening or morning depending on my schedule

Water Intake – 8 glasses daily

Food Intake – eat within my meal plan – no sugar no flour

Chart/log my exercise daily

Resume my evening activities

Petty Pary is Over !  I MUST do what I need to do within the range of my level of activity.  I must get up and move to burn. 

My foot is healing in a good way, I will be REAL careful so there are no further injuries.

Pray with me that God’s will be done.  

Relationship Night

God can Heal the broken Heart 

Lord forgive me for things that I do that are not of You.  Forgive me for not trusting You.  Forgive me for feeling down when I should be praising Your name.  Lord I want to be consistent in what I do.  I need this, Lord allow me to be satisfied with who I am, allow me to know that I am beautiful in Your eyes Lord.  Love on me Lord !  I know You love me but sometimes I don’t love myself. 

My weekend was fabulous !  To start, Relationship Night was so on point.  I took a guest with me which was a special blessing.  The word is so important that I want others to be blessed by it.  On the ride to Relationship Night we discussed relationship and I shared with her something of importance to me regarding men.  I gave her details about how I feel about me being in a man/woman relationship.  I said things like, I don’t have time, I’m scared to open my heart”.  Typical things women thing about when they have been in hurtful relationships.  Well wouldn’t you know the Pastor Jeff from Way of Life, zeroed right into our conversation, it was as if he was in the car with us.  God has me in these teachings for a reason.  He is preparing me for a relationship, Yeah.  He taught in the book of Genesis and in the book of Solomon  7, taught us how a man of God should see his woman/wife and that a man should consider woman as a gift from God.  He said a man of God should see his woman as a woman of character and in doing so he will love on her in a Godly manner.  He also said a man should make a woman better than when he met her. (paraphrasing).  The word was so moving.  Others from NCBF came out for the first time too, it was a nice night out.  When Boaz approaching, Lord’s will we will be at Relationship Night as a date night. LOL  For real we need this type of teaching.

Oh yes, on Friday afternoon, I went to a Grief and Loss seminar hosted by Beech Brook.  It was a good training done by a very kind hearted former Beech Brook employee.  She was supportive to me while I suffered my loses.  Grief is a continuous process, never ending.  She touched on this and I confirmed it in my heart.  There is not a day that I do not think about my mother and son.  Sometimes all day.  I have gotten to the acceptance phase in my grieving which is somewhat healthy for me.  I think about my mother is such a positive way that I carry her around with me all the time.  She is with me in a good way.  My son is with me daily also.  It is more difficult to deal with his loss but I deal with it.  God has been good to me in this way.  I slip into depression if I linger on him too much.  So I have to be careful how I think about Chris.  I had prepared mentally for my mother’s passing since I was a child.  That had always been my worst nightmare.  When she was sick I was emotionally drained and physically a mess, I tried everything to save her and get her the help she needed.  She was tired so I had to let her go.  I did not want to continue to see her weak and in pain.  I knew she was ready when she told me she was ready because I knew in my heart she didn’t want to leave me.  So if she had reached that level of suffering I knew she was ready and that I could not be selfish and hold on.  But Chris, that’s a whole nether situation. 

Watching my mother die daily, caused me to eat uncontrollably.  I often thank God that I was not an alcoholic or a drug addict.  I would have over doses for sure.  Then I realized food could kill me too.  I had begun to feel tightness in my chest, tiring easy, it was not good.  I hated myself and thought of taking myself out of my misery on a few occasions.  I loved my daughter and grandson too much for this.  It would have ruined my daughter taken her right over the edge.  I needed to be here to help with my grandson and share his father’s memory.  So I stayed but continued to over eat.  I knew God was always with me so I reached out to Him and decided to live. 

I am so grateful to God for saving me and allowing me to rededicate my life to Him.  I have a different relationship with God now.  Through my brokenness I learned so much more about God and his grace and mercy. 

Saturday, morning a attended a worship “out of the box, stepping out of the comfort zone”, very inspirational and caused me to think about things differently.  Thinking about what would happen if I move verses what could happen if I choose not to move.  The advantages out weighted the disadvantages.  I want the project to sincerely benefit others and I have to trust God and know that he has set things up to do just that.  I cannot worry about being embarrassed, fear of failure, these are things that say I don’t trust God.  I have to be open to share. 

Sunday, I did not attend church.  Couldn’t move !  Stuck !  I get like this sometimes.  I have asked forgiveness in this area of my life.  I know it is the enemy and I allowed him to win.  I will continue to pray in this area.  Ariel and Jayden went to NCBF and after church Ariel and Jayden stopped by.  As I was taking off his coat, he said “I got a new shirt”.  I know, I know !  But it amazes me how children just begin to use words and communicate.  Jayden stayed with me for a few hours, it was good, we read books, played with stickers, ate dinner and he even took a nap. He is really potty trained, he told me 3 times he had to use the bathroom J  We had popcorn as a snack as I do, he told me he wanted some more.  When his mother came he told her “I want to stay with grandma”.  I think he knows I like to hear this type of talk, he smiled and went on with his mama.  He is something else.  It is so different having him over as a visitor verses living with me.

Beauty:  On Saturday after the morning workshop which was in Solon, I drove over to Aurora Farms and went in the CCO.  They had Bobbi Brown, Mac, Clinique, Este Lauder and Smashbox. They did not carry my foundation match NW 45.  I almost got a Bobbi Brown cream foundation, but decided against it.  I did pick up a Mac Lipstick Stain ‘Purposely Red’ which is nice.  I also got a brown lip liner. 

Food:  I ate ok this weekend, except for Saturday at a baby shower.  I was able to get back on track.  Saturday morning my workshop on “out of the box” was at Panera and I absolutely love their sticky buns.  I did not have anything like that, I ordered coffee and went and sat myself down and enjoyed the meeting.  My Sunday dinner was good and nutrition; pork rib, potatoes, corn on the cob, veggie.  I packed a nutrious lunch for today and I will be drinking water.

Exercise:  I will be incorporating my treadmill into my workout.  My foot is improving to the point where I can walk slowly on my treadmill.  Exercise gives me a feeling of accomplishment and success and I got to get it in.  Exercise is a part of me now.  Saturday I as I drove around the city I saw people, jogging and walking and I knew I would have been out there if I was not injured.  So I will be cranking up the treadmill.  I will pray that God will protect me.

Way too long, but I needed to get a lot out of my system.  

Coming Events :  Film festival, Minister Davis, gogirlgone lauch, Seed Team, Steve Harvey Movie (friday night), guest blogger on gonegirlgo

Blessing; Bless you and Others

Hey Pink Ladies - Keep on bringing the Beauty !

Lord I never get tired of giving You praise.  Your work in my life and the lives of others amazes me.  Lord You continue to bless and show us Your marvelous works.  I want you to forgive me of any sins that I have committed, big and small.  Lord work in me, use me.  I am grateful, and willing to accept Your will in my life.  Your will is not always easy but I trust that You will bring me through and be able to glorify You throughout the process.

Yesterday was a day of excitement for me.  Things are looking ok in my life.  Yes I have problems and issues, we all do but I know God is with me.  I have a friend in Jesus, who sticks to me like glue, who loves me like know other. 

Yesterday, Laura, Mary Kay Consultant was shown photographed with her pink Caddy.  My heart was so excited for her and the team.  She has worked hard over the years to help make women beautiful and build the women within her Mary Kay team.  I have the pleasure of knowing some of the ladies on her team and was equally excited for them.  The team has worked together to build a business.  Laura is a sweet heart of a woman and she loves the Lord. I am so pleased to be surround by soooo many successful woman who are working and creating in their purpose and passion.  I needed to see this yesterday, it was so encouraging .

Today I have a ½ training regarding grief and loss.  I pray it doesn’t bump me out as I continue to work through my healing.  God will give me the strength.  And it will be nice to get out of the office and mingle with other coworkers I rarely get the chance to see. 

CEO of gonegirlgo has asked me to be a special guest on their blog.  I am excited because I love to write and share.  I have reviewed the outline and see that the questions are thought provoking and will challenge me to do some thinking, homework and keep me moving forward.  So it is a blessing.  When I say blessing I mean it blessing me and hopefully it will bless others.  I got tons of homework :)  In 1994 I graduated from CWRU with a master’s degree and was relieved that my education had ended.  Little did I know that it had just begun.  I have since learned that life experience, the growing process is a learning process.  Gonegirlgo challenges you to learn, grow and go.  I am pleased to be a part of the movement.

I have things to do tomorrow and have them mapped out.  Lord willing I will get through all my tasks.  I am going to Relationship Night tonight and bringing a girlfriend with me.  It will be educational and lots of fun to hang out.  I like the concept of doing it on Friday Night the Pastor of the church that facilitates the sessions says he does them on Friday as that is the night most people use to go out and club and he likes have something for singles and couples to do that is Godly.  We will be all in the Word tonight.  I put my bible in the car, I am EXCITED.

Beauty:  Shout Out to Mary Kay - In the summer when I am not wanted the feel of medium to full coverage foundations, I turn to my old stand by Mary Kay Tinted Moisturizer.  It gives me the sheer, light  coverage I need to get through the summer's heat.  I used to love Downtown Brown, ya'll that was my lipstick, I ordered it like clockwork.

Eating: I had my meals and enjoyed them.  I had steak as my dinner protein, delicious with 1/2 yam, salad and steamed brocilli.  DELICIOUSNESS !  I felt good about what I ate yesterday.  I will pick up a salad for lunch and take it to my training, and will most likely have dinner with friends after Relationship Night.  Yeah !  Yeah !  Steak or Chicken and salad.  Good choices !

Well as we use to say in my home church of my youth “Until we Meet Again”.

Stay encouraged and work to be a blessing (to yourself and others). 

Peace Out

EXCITED about Things .........

Me and Nique- my baby girl - now grown :) 

Lord today Your love brings me excitement.  I am so grateful for who You are in my life.  You amaze me, I marvel in your many wonders.  You are so great and magnificent.  I am asking You to forgive me of anything that I have done that has stood in the way of me being used as Your vessel.  Lord gives me words that I need to glorify You and bring forth Kingdom Building.  Lord I thank You in advance for all that You have planned.  I thank You solo much.  I thank You for healing; I thank You for be my mother, father, my sister and my brother. Lord humble my heart remove any pride, help me to live a life that honors You.  You give me a great sense of PEACE.

I LOVE my weekends.  The weekends for me give me a break from the day to day.  These days I get to run my errands and take care of some of my needs.  My weekend ventures always interest me.  I am careful of what I plan and I like it to be enjoyable and exciting.  This weekend I will be careful around my eating over the past few weeks since my foot has been injured I have been off the chain.  This week I have been on track.  Thank You Lord.  I have been seeking God’s strength and He has given it to me. 

Friday night, Lord willing I will attend Relationship Night which meets every 2^nd and 4^th Friday night.  This is an exciting and  amazing night for singles, couples and married folks.  The pastor brings forth the word of God, supporting with scripture and real life examples.  I so look forward to these nights.  I have invited a guess who has shown interest, I pray she can attend, it is such a blessing.  It is one of those things that you wish everyone could be a part of.  If she doesn’t attend I will saddle up and drive with Stephanie H.  Friday is Ariel’s birthday I am preparing a dip for her get to together.  She is usually more excited about her birthday, but some of her plans have not panned out.  Saturday I may be attending Ariel’s cookout or a friend’s baby shower.  I will do as the Lord leads me.  Ohhhhhh, how exciting, Saturday is the last day for Ulta’s 20% off sale.  I may stop in and pick up the large makeup setting spray.  I may, I use it daily so it would be worth it to pick it up J  Also I will stop by the Mac counter and pick up prep and prime translucent powder.  Mac counter is ALWAYS exciting.  Sunday is Worship Service, the Word will be delivered and I am expecting great things.  Get to see the people of God and also see other’s turn their lives over to Christ.  Super EXCITING.  I will prepare my Sunday dinner, Nique may be able to come if her car is operable.  I love our Sunday’s dinners.

Meal Planning:  I plan to do my shopping for my meals this evening to reduce my errands for the weekend.  My grocery list is usually consistent every week; eggs, protein (meats), veggies (fresh or frozen), fruit, instant original oatmeal, bags of lettuce and toppings, yams or red skin potatoes (both baked).  I get my toppings from Heinen’s salad bar, it is already cut up and ready (I’m lazy about chopping), extras as needed; vinegar, garlic, Italian season (Heinens), diet coke, water L, kosher salt, PAM, garlic butter J.  The no sugar, no flour plan keeps things simple.  I cook my proteins in the oven as I get dressed for work, take a protein for lunch and the other one is for my dinner.  It is an easy way of life.  My variety comes in selecting proteins; fish, chicken, pork, beef. I can have shrimp, tuna also.  Other ways to find variety is in my selection of veggies; turnip/mustard, broccoli, peas, string beans.  My salad is usually consistent, I like the salad I like.  My breakfast doesn’t deviate; 2 eggs, banana or apple, 1 oz. original oatmeal (microwave).  My seasoning makes my salad and proteins delicious.  Heinen carries an Italian Season that is delicious and adds so much flavor.  It is costly but it is well worth it.  It is about 7 bucks and I go through a bottle once a month.  I use the frozen garlic cubes and cilantro cubes.  Deliciousness.  I get so excited at my dinner time, because I don’t have to rush through it, I can give God thanks for keeping me on focus and grateful to have a good meal before me.  It is my quiet time with the Lord.  A time of peace.  I never had such peace with my food prior to no sugar, no flour plan.  My meals are so good and tasty.  I thank God for this because when I follow the plan correctly I do not crave other foods. 

Beauty:  I have made an emergency appointment with Ms. Juanita for Friday.  My hair is weighty and I would like some layers.  Excited to see how it turns out. 

PHOTO:  I uploaded a picture my ex-husband took of me and Nique at Jayden’s birthday party in December 2011.  I loved the photo and he got it framed and gave it to me for my birthday.  I was so excited when I saw it and it meant a lot to me.  Nique me and LJ (ex) have a bond as family.  We all knew we wished Chris and my mom were in the shot.  It is like an unspoken thing.  We all feel it and keep it movin !   That was really thoughtful.  He tries to make up for the past, I have forgiven him and we keep it movin !  The watch is my new Michael Kor’s knock off of his boyfriend style, which I ordered through Amazon for 18 bucks.  I have to get some links taken out of it today.  I like it a lot, I was so excited when I got the package, and I couldn’t wait to open it up.  It is a weighty piece which I like, not as weighty as Kor’s but close.  I am such a knock off queen.  I know Kor’s has more quality but I am not able to pay nor can I justify 250 bucks.  But I do love the boyfriend style of watch.

Remember it is "who you know", I know the Lord and he provides me with Godly people.  I will be attending this affair this Saturday morning.  I am so excited about it. " Living Outside Your Comfort Zone", I like being surrounded by such positive people who are working to push themselves beyond their ordinary life.  I networked with Terri at Zoe's event gonegirlgo and we had great conversation.  Praise God !  I will get to stop in the CCO (Cosmetic Company Store) which is in the Solon/Aurora area.  Excited !

See ya !!  Stay in Prayer !  Keep your focus on God !  Remember in everything make sure what you do glorifies God.  

EARNED RESPECT - Tagged I'm It

My new black wedge and black boot - Yeah 

Lord I thank You and magnify Your Holy Name.  I am asking You to forgive me of any sins.  I want to be a vessel for You to use and I need to look more like You.  Lord I thank You for blessing me with healing.  Healing of my heart for loss and my body.  Healing is a slow process but I now know things get better.  Your favor, grace and mercy bring hope for a better future. It offers peace that surpassing all understanding.  Lord for this and all things I am soooooo grateful.  I could search the world over and find know one like You.  Lord Your will be done in my life !!!!

Over the past few days my supervisor is on a well deserved vacation.  The Lord works in me in so many ways, always showing me.  Since my supervisor has been gone I have been tagged as the person in charge of managing and making decisions in the department.  OK go back to line one of this paragraph, “well deserved vacation”.  I have learned so much about responsibility, commitment and managing in her absence.  She deserves to rest from all this responsibility.  I have gained a new sense of respect for her work, and what it takes to keep things moving.  I have managed, made decision and most importantly I have walked in her shoes.  I now know how her job, and I have only done a small taste of it.  The day to day stuff, I have not gone to the many meetings that she attends or done and ran reports.  I needed this experience to be able to deal with her in a more respectful, appreciative manner.  My previous director has been available to me in a big way.  Very helpful and for this I am grateful. 

Yesterday I went to the doctor for my fractured foot.  I received encouraging news, that in 3 weeks things should be better and healed.  I got a boot and it is black.  Good news is I can wear wedge heel on the other foot to give me more height, because the boot is higher.  The wedge balances it out.  And of course it is more fashionable than the flat J

I am so grateful that the healing is coming along nicely.  Healing is a process, emotional and physical healing.  I know this from personal experience and from the children I work with on a day to day as a therapist.  It is slow but healing happens, you have to slow yourself down, adjust to the changes, and want recovery and take the steps necessary.   Life is good.

I am working on my homework assignment for the new project which is IN PRODUCTION J  Lord give me what I need to carry out my tasks.

Healthy Eating:  Today I continue to be on track with my eating situation.  I had 1 oz of oatmeal and 2 eggs, missed my fruit.  But I got my Starbucks dark roast.  Lunch will be salad with tuna.  The combination is so delicious to me.   I feel good about what today will bring.  I cooked my protein this morning as I dressed so when I get home I can have dinner.  The doctor told me I should be up and running (power walking) real soon.  I was so encouraged.  So what this means to me is I have to continue to be patient with myself, taking care of my foot.  I also have to be really careful of the foods I intake as to not increase my weight.  I will be able to do this because I am focusing on God , knowing and believing that He will get me through this. 

Beauty:  This morning I did not have to put concealer under my eyes.  I did not see the need for it.  I put the MAC Prep and Prime with filler and it looked OK for the my day look.  I will be picking up the MAC pressed translucent prep and prime to use as a setting.  This will give a even smoother look to help cover the under eye lines.  I guess what I am saying is the darkness is slowly diminishing as I use my day and night eye creams from Laroach the night one has retinol (sp). The eye cream that I use in the morning hydrates.   But I still have under eye lines which the Mac products help fill.  I have used a few different techniques.  But I always knew I had to treat the program with the eye cream and not rely on concealing.  The eye creams are doing what they said they would do.  

Purpose and Passion

God's work

Lord Jesus You never fail to amaze me.  You bless me more than I could ever image.  I know You can do amazing things, but You show me Your love and give me purpose.  Purpose that glories You and helps other.  Lord allow me to be a good stewart of these blessings.  Please Lord !  Keep me humble along the way remembering that it is all about You.  I am only the vessel Your humble servant.  Lord bless us so that we can move this project forward.  Provide us with what we need along the way.  Allow our work to bless the magnitude.  Thank You so much !

Well, yesterday I was blessed beyond my wildest dream.  I trust the Lord because He is able and so very capable of doing all things.  BUT when I see him working in my life it amazing me.  I always say this “I LOVE to see the Lord work”.  And last evening He worked His hand in my life in a way that only God could do.  WOW !! WOW !!  Tenth Talent Productions, LLC made up of the talents of Andrea Swift and Nicole Hargrove presenting me with a proposal.  The proposal for a testimony of my journey.  Now this testimony would be used to help believers and non believers with their weight loss journey.  My blog, yeah this blog would be used and we would also use You Tube.  Also incorporated would be some self image building all supported by scripture.  Marvelous, simply Marvelous.  Last night as we talked Andrea broke down the word and I sat in awe of her understanding of the Word and her thirst.  She said God puts the super in the natural.  Get it Supernatural.  He can take what we as humans do and put the super in it and make it more than our human minds can do.  Ms. Nicole is a friend of mine, I call her a thinker, she thinks and is smart woman, thinks quickly and knows stuff J  God is allowing her to use her talents to glory His work.  I sat there and was like how ya’ll know all this stuff, and then it hit me GOD. 

I have been asking God to allow me to use my life to help others.  I want my story to help others that are struggling and need that motivation.  The channel could be called Olivia’s Daughter as is this blog.  I want the things I do to represent God in a positive manner and incorporate my mother’s spiritual influence on my life. 

Now we have lots of work to do.  I have my homework.  But I can say this is a passion so my energy will be right.  The Lord brought us together for this collorabtion so it is of God.  God will get the glory throughout my channel as he has throughout my blog.  I want to live a life pleasing to God that blesses others.  I have had journey which has caused me to have any tears but also much joy.  As I am sure many of you have had and so you understand.  Please stay tuned for the launch of Olivia’s daughter. 

The team of Tenth Talent Production, LLC are wonderful women of God, so I feel confident in allowing them to produce my testimony.  There are other special things that we discussed so stay tuned for updates. 

Please keep us in pray as we move forward in preparing to do God’ s work.

A special shout out to gonegirlgo (Zoe Brown) who helped me to see that from written words dreams can be developed and executed.  She is another sister who loves the Lord and who is moving forward on her dream.  Thanks !

Beauty Tip:  Embrace who God made you to be.  Loving who God made you to be honors God and gives Him glory.  Don’t be hard on yourself, love yourself and help others.  Share let it go (Andrea).  Sharing is always of God.  Purpose and Passion :) :) :) :) 

Diet:  Yesterday I got back on the band wagon.  I ate my 3 prepared meals with popcorn as snack.  Yeah Yeah Yeah.  I have foot appt. today.  Prayfully I will be back on the workout path real soon.  Lord’s will be done.  I trust Him.

WOW - Absolutely Wonderful Weekend

Jayden R. Jordan - Resurrection Sunday - Grandma's lil man

Lord I thank You for Your sacrifice of Love.  You die for our sins that we may live.  For this I am so grateful.  Lord forgive me for any sins that I have committed.  I am working to be obedient to You and live in Your will.  Forgive me for any ill thoughts, remove from me any character flaws which stand in my way of serving You.  Lord thank You sooooo much for living and dwelling in me.  For allowing me a second, third, fouth…….. chance.  I trust You Lord !

Resurrection Service was so wonderful.  I found myself not being able to look at the screen imaging my savior going through the torture he went through leading to his death.  I would close my eyes, then I thought about it and realized I needed to see what He went through for my sins.  It was moving.  Pastor’s sermon was so appropriate for Resurrection Sunday and it was nice to see Sis Tanya standing by his side.  Twenty Five (25) years of marriage.  WOW and another WOW.  I was also impressed when he said that he and Sis Tanya sought out counseling for their marriage.  They know the importance of seeking help, it was very humbling.  If I had stayed married I would have been married 25 years also.  WOW

Check my grandson out, Jayden on Resurrection Sunday.  He is growing up so fast.  Looking like Chris more and more.  He is such a blessing to my life.

WOW what a fantastic weekend.  I need to begin by saying I absolutely blew my heathly lifestyle approach to life.  Blew it.  But today is a new day.  Saturday, Sonic, absolutely divine, Saturday evening Retirement Affair; catfish,. Ribs and sides, Sunday; dinner at the Jenkins; Lord Lord Lord, I ate til I couldn’t eat any more, literally, Yeah WOW !  You see the thing is I don’t regret it.  J   No I don’t.  Now today is a new day and I will begin with my salads, I go to the doctor tomorrow regarding my broke up foot and he evaluate to see if I need cast.  I am praying that it won’t.  I really am ready to get back to some slow walking.  But I will see what God’s plan is for me.  I will do as He sees fit for me.  He knows best.  I talked to Kathy D from True Image yesterday, I miss her so much, she is my fitness Guru.  She encouraged me and said what many have said “God wants to slow down and you look fine”.  It was encouraging, but I didn’t tell her about all this food I am consuming so I am confessing it to ya’ll   LOL

Beauty:  We BE HAULING, WE BE HAULING  On Saturday, a friend and I took a road trip and did some hauling at Ulta and Target. We had 20% off coupons for Ulta, which was real helpful.  Savings dollars really helps with buying products they tend to be expensive whether it is drugstore and don’t let it be high end.  My friend got her brows done at Ulta and they looked great.  The young lady that did her brows had really nice lashes.  As she was doing my friends brows I was also checking out her lashes.  At first I thought they were false but I didn’t see a strip.  I asked her and she told us, and of course, we picked it up and was able to get a trial size for 10 bucks, regular size is 22 and we were able to use our 20% making it even cheaper.  I really like the mascara I had been using Zoom by Mac.  Zoom can be clumpy and a lot of product is on the wand and you have to be real careful applying Zoom.  Benefit's "they'reReal " did not leave me clumpy, clumsiness did occur when I applied second coat.  For me this is a one coat massacre, which is cool, the product will last longer.  The ladies at Ulta said this is a top selling mascara.  I have used several masacra, Dior Show, Zoom and lots of drugstore brands and this has the best performance giving false lash look.  Beauty consultant said the product is water resistant and not waterproof, whatever !!!!  Falsies by Maybelline is good but not this good.   It was good hanging out with my friend, we had fun, being all girly and stuff. She is a beauty guru in her own right.  She does her research and knows products and knows how a product should perform.      

they're Real - thumps up

Our haul to Target was a bit disappointed as far as beauty supplies, Targets are reducing carrying the almost full line of ELF and have downsized to only carrying the new sets.  I love the individual items; brushes, brush cleaner, highlighters, brow kits, etc.  Now the one on University Circle sells more than the one at East Gate, but they don’t restock quickly enough.  It seems as if ELF is selling and offering better deals on their site.  They run 50% off regularly, so maybe regular ELF consumers are going to the site verses Target.  As I do my research I see more hauls from the site where beauty bloggers are getting large boxes of products and backups at 50% with free shipping.  I like this concept of saving of I, me myself like running into target and picking up my products and backups.

                                                           

Now what was worth our trip to Target was jewelry.  We would some really nice and different pieces.  They had some fabulous colors and we took full advantage of the selection.  I love to accessorize, therefore I love jewelry.  The necklaces are definitely signature pieces wearing them alone or laying it with other necklaces gave a really classy look. 

Inside the CCO

                                                                       

I think the next time we will ride to the CCO (Cosmetic Company Store) at Aurora Outlet.  Where they have Este Lauder, Clinique, Mac and Bobbi Brown cosmetics at 20% off.  Most of the items are items that have been discontinue and hard to find.  They do carry most of the foundations; pressed; liquid, powers, and Holiday Kits.  They sell traincases and MAC brushes and also I know skin care products from Clinique and Este Lauder.  Oh yeah I have gotten some really nice Lancome eyeshadows for real cheap, they usually keep them on a special clearance table.   If I recall they sell colognes.  I have had both good and bad experience with the sales people, some know the products and some really don’t.  So it is helpful to know the line and especially know your color for matching foundations. 

                                                                    

I know my daughter is getting me a Sephora gift card for my belated birthday gift.  I am excited.  And with it I can pick up some products and get a free make over.  Excited to have this experience.  Never had a makeover at Sephora.  I will like to see what they will do with me J  I will give update and post a picture or two.

Oh yeah, I found a another flat blue shoe to match my soft shoe.  It has an open toe.  I picked it up from Payless.  I am not found of flats so I am not trying to spend 50 bucks for flats at DSW.